What was the biggest news story of last year? The sexcapades of Tiger Woods. The three-month-old story was so sensational that it is still worthy of headlines, late night joke fodder and was most likely the cause of the recent worldwide occurrences of earthquakes.
Personally, I don't care that Tiger Woods is a cheating turd biscuit, what I find interesting is: a) how long he hid his indiscretions from TMZ and b) that there weren't any allegations of sexual assault in the mix. He must be nice to his mistresses or something...
This brings me to the topic of Ben Roethlisberger. I have been publicly spanked in the past (mostly on Twitter) by a lawyer friend because of my opinions, which are largely based on the douche-factor, on the alleged criminal behavior of a certain gotcha...er...investigative journalist. Full disclosure: I'm judgmental.
Ben Roethlisberger has been accused, again, of sexual assault. I don't know if he's guilty or not...I wasn't there. But I do know this: Roethlisberger is an epic dumbass.
Exhibit A: The Motorcycle Crash
In June, 2006, Roethlisberger was seriously injured in a motorcycle accident. He was not wearing a helmet nor was he licensed to operate this particular class of racing-style motorcycle. Ben suffered multiple facial fractures including a broken jaw. His coach, Bill Cowher had discussed concerns with Ben about his hobby after the motorcycle accident that sidelined Cleveland Browns tight end, Kellen Winslow, Jr, the year before.
Exhibit B: The First Sexual Assault Accusation
In July, 2008, a Harrah's Casino employee claims that Ben Roethlisberger raped her after she was called to his room to fix his television. The alleged victim, Andrea McNulty strikes me as a whackjob...and I honestly didn't believe her story until...
Exhibit C: Hello Dumb Dumb
Last Friday, Ben and some friends were barhopping in Milledgeville, Georgia, where according to a 20-year-old college student, Ben sexually assaulted her in the bathroom of the Capital Club. According to one article:
...reports have called the woman "hysterical" as she described to police what happened, and the police also described her as someone who "did not look like" someone who would make up this kind of story.Hmmm...
Ben Roethlisberger is guilty of epic stupidity and bad judgment, at the very least. After the motorcycle accident, Roethlisberger returned to practice in August 06. He wore a neon green helmet cover which served as a big, bright stop sign to the defense, he was still on the mend from facial reconstruction surgery. After searching many, many photos of Big Ben I was able to find *one* of him wearing the green sheath:
This image reminded me of another: